Never sleep

So, I'm not entirely sure this is finished, but here it is anyway.


I won't discuss
even for a second
the fashion in which sleep pulls a cord to draw curtains over your eyes
willing rest and replenishment.
Mine is a doorstep she graces just long enough for me to notice.
She bats her eyelashes
but does not linger
that fickle bitch

In the beginning
it was a grandiose adventure.
I swam in information
climbed words stacked as high as I could possibly fathom
things sounded like they never had.
I swooned and sang and cried for beauty.
Sometimes I talked in circles
or maybe not

Day-long nights made me alive
but melted down
into hour-long minutes and aching temples, aching temples.

"I think this makes no sense", I thought
This was not a world I was supposed to have seen, I was here by grave, divine error
my name mispoken in an augery
but how to escape?
Doors and windows of the usual kind are of no use in a place like this
and this map is of someone else's brain

Instincts are unlearned when you trod here
Touch this soil and you shift, not to a god but more than whatever you were before
and you forget what was ever so great about that in the first place
being slave to a body
I could not remember how to close my eyes
I watched shapes writhe and contort and reality was lost
Birds in the morning are bats at night, you know

Now time is infinite.
It loops and is reworked and loops
until its purpose is eradicated
and I am left with a guilty omniscience and circles for eyes.
Eternity is chaos,
I want to go back.